I sense your spirit is in conflict. And you just don’t know how to get past all the barriers. Just act without being so calculating. Sometimes you have to just step out in faith. Following God requires obedience and faith.
All the things the world has to offer haven’t really satisfied you and made you happy. You know this site is a source of God’s truth. You prove it from scripture and you feel it deep down in your spirit. You feel it spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically. Because it is the truth from God’s word. Fully supported by God’s word. But I don’t need to tell you this because you know it.
You may be full physically but you’re empty spiritually and emotionally. And you’re still feel empty and are longing for something you don’t have. You know something is missing but you just don’t quite know what it is.
You feel fulfilling your real destiny lies elsewhere and not in your present situation. Who am I talking to? I can feel and sense your spirit crying out. Just act in faith. You will never know if you don’t act.